We've all heard that half of all marriages end in divorce. For second and third marriages the divorce rate is even higher. Almost everyone who gets married expects it to last for ever. But if this expectation is not accompanied by the realistic understanding of the ups and downs and hard work involved in marriage, then the outlook is indeed bleak.
We've all heard that marriage takes work, but how many of us actually do that work? It's easy to think of the rare examples of marriages that are strong and effortless and believe that ours will be one of those. But what if it isn't? It's easy to jump into marriage hoping for the best without making a real commitment to work on the relationship.
Recognizing the problem is key to preventing divorce. If you are unhappy but cannot say why, how can you expect to become happy again? Who is to say that divorce will solve your problem? Put a name to your grievances. Perhaps you feel distance between your spouse and yourself; you don't communicate like you used to or busy schedules leave little time for romance. Maybe you feel unwanted, ignored or taken for granted and this is the cause of your misery. Whatever the reason, determining the root of unhappiness is the first step to divorce prevention.
Just determining the issues, however, does not cure the problem. You have to talk to your partner about what's bothering you. This may prove difficult, especially if one of the problems in your marriage is communication. You may want to ask your partner to go with you to a marriage counselor who can help you talk to your spouse. If they are unwilling to go with you, you can still go alone and work with a counselor who can give you tips on working through the problem.
There are also countless books on the market to help boost communication. This step focuses on expressing your feelings, not dealing with them just yet. When you and your partner understand each other and acknowledge the gravity of the situation, you can begin to work together.
The last step is to actually work on resolving your issues. You'll find that some may be easily fixed, and some you really have to work at. For instance, communicating effectively may be harder for the two of you than, perhaps, getting the romance back.
Stubborn habits may be difficult to overcome and a help from a professional may be invaluable to creating healthier habits. It is this point where commitment and effort are necessary. We may have to face our fears, faults and weaknesses as well as show our vulnerability - all of which can be trying and uncomfortable. However, dedication can be rewarding to the end. - 15431
We've all heard that marriage takes work, but how many of us actually do that work? It's easy to think of the rare examples of marriages that are strong and effortless and believe that ours will be one of those. But what if it isn't? It's easy to jump into marriage hoping for the best without making a real commitment to work on the relationship.
Recognizing the problem is key to preventing divorce. If you are unhappy but cannot say why, how can you expect to become happy again? Who is to say that divorce will solve your problem? Put a name to your grievances. Perhaps you feel distance between your spouse and yourself; you don't communicate like you used to or busy schedules leave little time for romance. Maybe you feel unwanted, ignored or taken for granted and this is the cause of your misery. Whatever the reason, determining the root of unhappiness is the first step to divorce prevention.
Just determining the issues, however, does not cure the problem. You have to talk to your partner about what's bothering you. This may prove difficult, especially if one of the problems in your marriage is communication. You may want to ask your partner to go with you to a marriage counselor who can help you talk to your spouse. If they are unwilling to go with you, you can still go alone and work with a counselor who can give you tips on working through the problem.
There are also countless books on the market to help boost communication. This step focuses on expressing your feelings, not dealing with them just yet. When you and your partner understand each other and acknowledge the gravity of the situation, you can begin to work together.
The last step is to actually work on resolving your issues. You'll find that some may be easily fixed, and some you really have to work at. For instance, communicating effectively may be harder for the two of you than, perhaps, getting the romance back.
Stubborn habits may be difficult to overcome and a help from a professional may be invaluable to creating healthier habits. It is this point where commitment and effort are necessary. We may have to face our fears, faults and weaknesses as well as show our vulnerability - all of which can be trying and uncomfortable. However, dedication can be rewarding to the end. - 15431
About the Author:
The hunt for a top Austin divorce lawyer is much simpler when you visit Austin Divorce Help. Learn the basics of divorce for free by watching the divorce seminar by an Austin Texas lawyer on demand.
